How to forget a girl? Ah, a question asked by boys, men and women all over the world time and again, whenever their hearts get broken. Which is understandable, because why would you want to have the memories of someone who treated you as if you never really meant anything to them?
I can understand how hard it is to let go – we’ve all been there. But it’s always worse for those who are in love for the first time, because well, they don’t even know how to process such an intensity of emotions overflowing in your brain.
How to Forget a Girl
Keep yourself busy
Whenever you’re free, your mind will automatically go back to think about the one thing you’re most attached to – and that’s her. So no matter what you do, keep yourself occupied day in and day out, so much so that you never have a moment’s spare time to think and daydream about her. With the passage of time, your brain will rewire itself and memories of her will begin to fade away and become less painful with time.
Join a gym
Why? Well, because apart from keeping you physically fit and getting you to do something different in your route, working out is actually good for your mind too. Physical activities release endorphins from your body, which upon reaching your brain, reduce your perception of pain. In fact, their effect on the human mind has been likened to that of morphine – both make you equally happy. If not a gym, then opt for something as physically strenuous, like swimming, basketball, volleyball, judo, karate, etc.
Shift your focus
There’s a void in your life and she’s not gonna fill it. So why not find something that will? And no, I’m not talking about one night stands because they are too meaningless and shallow for you in the long run. How about going out of your way to fill someone else’s void? Now I don’t mean this romantically. I mean, be a good human and help those around you. How about that old lady who sits by herself on her porch every night ever since her husband died? Go and talk to her. You both would be excellent company for each other, and you’d be filling the voids in each other's hearts.
Get rid of all reminders
Photos, gifts, clothes, social media connections, mutual friends, movies, songs, places, foods – whatever it is that reminds you of her, delete it, throw it away or stop visiting those places. This is one of the best ways when working on how to forget a girl.
Block her from your social media
I’d say delete, but I know people are in the habit of stalking their exes. So go the extra mile and block her. If you have mutual friends that you can afford to get rid of, remove them from your list. Or at least, hide all their updates from your newsfeed. Go out of your way to ensure she’s nowhere in your digital life.
Understand your triggers
What things make you think the most about her? Is it two people kissing? Is it a fond memory you shared that you cannot help but relive? Whatever those triggers are, avoid them at all costs.
Vent your emotions
Yeah, unlike what Hollywood would want you to believe, keeping it all inside you to be that stoic and macho man doesn’t work in real life. If anything, such pent up emotional frustration and trauma will eventually find its way out. And when it does, an innocent person will be the victim of your outrage.
Talk to a friend or family member you can trust. If you have no one to talk to when it comes to how to forget a girl, go to see a therapist or simply join one of the hundreds of anonymous forums or groups online made specifically for the purpose of venting.
Tell yourself that she isn’t the one
If she is, she would have stayed by your side through thick and thin. But she didn’t, did she? So she’s obviously not as perfect for you as you were thinking. Now the sooner you actually accept this fact, the sooner you will be able to forget her. Rewire your brain by telling yourself constantly that you were wrong to think she was the one.
Sleep and eat well
The thing is, giving up on your sleep or your diet is not gonna bring her back. If anything, it is going to make things worse for you, both emotionally and physically. So make sure you’re eating at least 4-5 small meals per day, and getting at least 7 hours' quality sleep.
Devote some time to yourself
Now this could be something as small as a weekend at a spa or bed & breakfast getaway, or something bigger like visiting a new city, state or country. Do whatever you think will suit your convenience and budget. Because every single one of these options will provide you the change you need in your life right now.
The thing about how to forget a girl is that it’s not a switch that will go off in your mind one fine day. You will have your ups and downs and you will have your moments of weakness and strength. But the most important thing for you to remember is that you need to preserve and be patient. This process takes a lot of time and there’s just no substitute for that.
Millennia ago, Indian sages used to do meditation to find enlightenment. Today, a watered down version of that very form of meditation can effectively not only deal with the emotional frustration and stress of your day to day life, but also provide you with unparalleled peace of mind.