At times, men find women hard to understand and don't know how to go about winning them. Understanding women is a common challenge for all men. But how come some men have found it easy to talk to women while others are still struggling? Amazingly, it has nothing to do with their looks, wealth or being smart. Ideally, they have a special combination of two personality traits that are irresistible to women. It is all in their persistence and confidence. Women want men to pursue them and when they realize that someone is working hard to get them, it pleases them. Here are more tips to help you pick up a woman.

How to Pick Up Women


Find the right target

First, getting the right woman comes first, prior to making any kind of approaches. The woman should look ready to converse with a stranger for whatever reason. It is not easy to tell when a woman is looking for new company, but an open woman is likely going to make the conversation somewhat comfortable. Pay attention to the following signs when trying to pick up a woman:

  • Approach her if she checks you out, like looking at you several times, smiling at you when your eyes meet, one or more of her friends looking at you and giggling at the same time, etc.

  • Do not approach her if she is on a date with one or more friends, but if she yawns all the time or keeps rolling her eyes when talking to those around her, then make your move. 

  • Do not approach her if she is really involved in the conversation and she hasn't looked at anyone else for a long time like an hour.


Get prepared mentally

Mental readiness is vital to pick up any woman whether in a planned or a random manner. Women have plans for their days and obviously, getting hit in the midst of their many activities is not one of them. Therefore, men should be mentally ready when they decide to strike up that conversation. It is advisable to start by talking about what’s happening in the surroundings, like commenting on a long wait in a queue or talking about the flower shop nearby. Any type of reactions should be expected but persistence in a good way can help. This is very important when learning how to pick up women.


Approach her confidently

After finding the right woman, being confident about the intentions held and having faith in yourself are very important. This shows her that you know what you are doing and that you really want to know her, but you won't be that bothered if you're rejected. Here are some tips on what to do:

  • First make eye contact from a distance and when you walk towards her, lock eyes.

  • Do remember to smile to show you're comfortable with the situation and dissolve any nervousness or awkwardness.

  • Do not slouch, do not act indifferently and do not cross your arms, which will make those who are interested in you walk away.

  • Give her your undivided attention by facing her or avoiding distractions like checking your phone.

  • Dress well. You don't have to buy something expensive but it should fit well on you. Besides, keep good hygiene, like wearing clean clothes and showering regularly.


Observe her body language

Reading her body language by looking at various subtleties and signs based on the situation is very crucial. If a woman fidgets or taps some things around, she definitely is nervous and uncomfortable. Besides, check to see if she licks her lips, runs her hands through her hair, shakes her hair or gives you a wide-open laugh showing teeth. These are good signs, but if she turns away as she laughs, she in most cases is just being polite and not in for it.


Follow the 15-minute rule

How to pick up women? Know that patience is needed during the first contact in order to find out a woman’s interests and her attitude about having casual sex. All the needed information can be obtained in 15 minutes and therefore, it is important to monitor her behaviors all this while. This will help in making well-informed conclusions about her as a number of combination factors emerge during the conversation. And this helps you decide whether she is interested in the offer being made or not.


Use negative hits

Compliments can help you start a conversation with a woman. However, it is not wise to dwell on that. Over-compliments will kill a man’s chance. Instead, a number of negative hits are very useful in keeping her interested and keeping her ego and honesty in check, especially if she's the center of your world and you think she is the most beautiful creature in the globe. 

For instance, compare her hairstyle with that of some celebrity, and say that most women can't wear it beautifully but this hairstyle just looks good on her. Always remember that a negative hit is not an insult but it should end up in a positive note. 


Make intentions clear

Lies in conversations and any types of relationships will ruin everything. It is therefore recommended to be open about your intentions at first place, so you should clearly but not bluntly hint that you don't want a committed relationship but something casual to have fun. 

If intentions are made clear from the start, she will not feel misled at the end. Therefore, you should bring this up early on in order to set the tone for the conversation or for anything that follows. Once this is set, no further talks need to take place unless things don’t go out as planned.


Have a wingman

For those pickups happening on streets, you will probably not have a friend with you and most likely you do not need one. However, the case is different when you are on a party or in a pub. It is always good to keep pretense of innocence at all times. Being with friends in a pub is an innocent move compared to going out alone. An ideal wingman needs to be a good conversationalist and funny in order to keep things rolling during quiet moments. This is one very important tip on how to pick up women.


Don't fear rejection

There is nothing to lose following a rejection, so rejection should be considered not as an end but as a new start. Even if you are rejected, you should try to get detached from the feeling of rejection; otherwise it will keep replaying in your mind and affect the next conversation, leading to failed pickups. Bear in mind that the first and major objective is to approach a woman for a conversation. And consider anything past that, like you two having a coffee together, as a bonus. Big smiles, humorous jokes, confidence and gentleness will show the woman your best side and decrease the possibility of failure.

You are just a human being, so mistakes and failures are inevitable, but you must learn from them, hone your skills and make yourself a better and more charming guy. Above all, it is all about focusing on how to say what has to be said and each contact is a step towards success -- picking up the women you want.


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