While going through life, we often need help from other people and let’s face it, no one wants to help a mean, irritating person. In general, to fit in well with others, being nice to them is essential. Not only does it make people want to do you favours, but it also brings the individual a sense of happiness when he or she does good things for someone. Knowing how to be a nicer person is something I believe we all want to learn, but we often fail to do that due to intrinsic factors. The following are my selection of 9 effective tips that can help you to be a nicer person.
9 Simple Ways to Be a Nicer Person
Be a Good Communicator
Communication, contrary to popular opinion, isn’t just about speaking well. In addition to speaking, it is also about listening and understanding. Clarity in all of these aspects is important. Make sure you know what the other person is trying to convey and then speak clearly about what you want to say. Being vague isn’t going to help the other person understand you, and misunderstanding can cause all sorts of problems. Listening is important as well. People take a liking to attentive people. They will feel good that you think they are worth listening to.
Often, we speak a lot of things without thinking them over and then regretting saying them afterwards. Words have a much sharper effect on people than you might think. Knowing how to be a nicer person includes restraining what one says and does. In daily life, you might make a light-hearted remark about someone that might seem humorous to you and others. But for the person in question, it might be offensive. So learn to bite back the words which you think might not be taken well. It is better to say nothing than to come across as a mean person.
Apologize, When Necessary
We usually take it as an ego-bruise of sorts when it comes to admitting that we were wrong. You take precedence over anyone and anything else in those situations. It is definitely hard to apologize to someone, no doubt. It takes great courage and maturity to concede “defeat”. But what most people don’t realize is that it makes the person think better of you. Assuming you are dealing with a generally nice person, he or she is more likely to feel closer to you when you apologize. Also, it is important not to think that the person is in the wrong. Your judgement may be clouded by bias, and that is exactly what happens more often than not.
Learn to Value Others’ Time
This is something I personally attach great value to. I am more likely to be open with someone who is punctual and keeps their time and therefore mine. Being punctual and sincere shows that you are not only principled and disciplined, but also recognize that other people are busy and keeping them waiting isn’t a very nice thing to do. This comes in great use during one’s professional life. Being tardy isn’t what people want to see in a potential employee or business partner. It shows carelessness which is very unattractive!
Accept That You Were Wrong
A big part of knowing how to be a nicer person is to be empathetic. One way to do this is to accept that you were wrong even when you think you weren’t. Objectively speaking, it is not possible for someone to know what another person is feeling completely. The remark you made that you think wasn’t all that bad may have been perceived very poorly by the other. If you are to be a nicer person, you would accept that and make necessary amends, mostly by apologizing.
How you speak is just as important as what you speak. Nobody takes a liking to someone who speaks loudly and yells at others for whatever reason. Even if it someone else is in the wrong, shouting or yelling is not a very good solution. It often makes you come across as the bad guy when you were clearly trying to avoid that. Speak calmly and with patience (although that may be hard at times, but nonetheless, try!). You are almost assured to be considered a decent human being. This also has the added benefit of people perceiving you as rational and therefore more understanding.
Short, simple and effective. You want to know how to be a nicer person? Start helping others unconditionally. Remember though that if you are expecting something in return for assisting someone, you’re not really helping that person. You are just being selfish but hiding it well. Help people you don’t know and who hold no stake in your daily life. Help the old lady carry her bag, help the grocer arrange his groceries, do something for someone while getting nothing in return. That is what society perceives as a truly nice person.
Express Your Value for Others
You want to be able to actually show that you value or care about someone other than yourself. For instance, when working on a team project that you are leading, share the spotlight with your teammates. Publicly credit them by saying that they have done an excellent job in this project. The two magic words which everyone wants to hear: “well done”. Tell the people around you how much you value them and the importance they hold to you. They will instinctively feel closer to you and will in turn show their affection for you.
Manners and Etiquette
We are all taught to greet someone in the morning, shake hands and ask how the other person is doing. But in the hustle of daily life, we often forget simple manners like these. Those who do remember, however, appear refined and classy: exactly the kind of person other people want to be around. Spend a minute or two each day asking how someone is doing or wishing them a good day. You don’t need a reason to be nice, just be! That is the essence of the matter itself.