When you’re young, you don’t really care about settling down. You only care about living your life on your own terms, exploring the world or even exploring yourself. A steady relationship isn’t on the minds of many. But with the passage of time and as you grow older, you don’t have the time to fool around; you want to settle down and have as mundane a life as you can. And then it all boils down to the type of man you want. Many mature women make the mistake of being in relationships with boys, hoping they would turn their ways around, but very few do. So what differs a man from a boy? How can you know whether you find yourself a boy or a man?
The Difference Between a Boy and a Man
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This is a term used by boys because they aren’t looking for anything beyond sexual gratification. But not men! Men are in it for the long haul.
Dates for boys often involve going to clubs, getting drunk, taking drugs and passing your night dropping dead on the couch. Or, you know, anything that ends up sex for them. For boys, that’s a definition of a great time, you know, time that is supposed to be spent knowing each other.
For men, dates mean serious business. Since it’s one of the best ways to get to know a woman, they opt for places where they can have genuine conversations with women, like coffee shops or art gallery displays.
The easiest way to know the difference between a boy and a man is to ask their views on commitment.
For boys, relationships usually mean hanging out, having fun and having lots of sex with their girlfriends. It seldom is anything beyond that because when you’re young, commitment is the last thing on your mind.
But for men, relationships are meant to last. They do not have time for flings or one night stands. They are on the lookout for someone they can settle down with, and aren’t scared when “marriage” is brought into the conversation.
Boys are insecure and they mask their insecurities by overcompensating, usually by buying big, flashy or expensive items. This is why you will find a lot of boys and even emotionally stunted men surrounded by people who always compliment their expensive clothes, watches, cars, etc.
But with mature men, their confidence comes from within. They know who they are and they also know that self-validation is the most important form of validation for them.
A boy masks his feelings because, for most boys, being a man means not being emotional. This is because society views emotional men as weak and thus, not manly. So boys usually keep their emotions bottled up inside and open up to only a few trusted friends, if any at all.
On the other hand, men embrace their vulnerability. As already explained in the previous point, since men seldom look for outside validation, their facial expressions match their emotions. They do not hesitate to appear weak or vulnerable in front of the people they trust, and that is what makes them become real men. This is one biggest difference between a boy and a man.
Boys generally communicate via texts, Facebook, Twitter, instant messages and the likes. And their lingo often is lyk dis. Annoying, right? All their emotions are expressed via SMS lingo and emoticons.
For men, however, communication is a form of sharing and bonding, which is why they type like adult. They avoid teenage lingo. They seldom use 20 emoticons at once and are often eloquent in their texts. In the very least, they know how to type like adults and not 7-year-old children.
Boys are into swag. You know, showing off their possessions, wearing caps that 12 year olds wear, showing off their underwear with their jeans hanging around their ankles, wearing oversized shirts or sometimes, shirts too tight. You get the picture.
With men, it’s always classic, and we don’t mean having to dress up in a tuxedo every time you go out on a date. No. You can wear jeans and a shirt and look stylish.
This one is an important difference between a boy and a man. Boys seldom apologize, especially if the apology is to be made to a woman. That’s because according to them, apologizing, accepting that they’re wrong, shows weakness, and weakness is not a quality that men carry.
On the other hand, a man knows that no one is perfect, including himself. So whenever he makes a mistake or hurts you, he makes sure he apologizes because he knows his manhood isn’t determined by his apologies, but his actions.
Difference in opinions
If you give a boy attitude or share an opinion that he perceives as attacking his, he often takes it personally and will go off on a rant, usually blaming you for being a stuck up bitch. Of course, it always ends in two ways – you two having a big fight or you accepting your fault where there is no fault to accept.
On the other hand, a man has the capacity to handle your attitude as well as let you have a vastly different opinion without attacking you for having it! This is especially important when you have major life crises or a bad day at work.
Boys will often feel the need to put you down time and again by indulging in name calling and playing the blame game, especially in public. This is because making you feel bad is one of the easiest ways for them to feel good.
Men, on the other hand, never wash dirty linen in public, nor do they indulge in cheap name calling, no matter how angry they are.
So, which difference between a boy and a man have you observed personally? Do you agree with our list or have one of your own? Let us know in the comments below.